Whatever happened to nice guys?
Remember watching Superman when you were younger and thinking what a nice guy he was - he saved peoples' lives, he was a total gentlemen with women and he looked very fetching in his suit.
When he was a total gentlemen he did the usual chilvary gestures - opening doors for women, complimenting, bringing flowers on the first date - oh, he puts you boys these days to shame.
Today, it's like it's too much effort for a bloke to be a gentlemen like the good ole' days. Whether it's us woman who have confused men that we don't want it or it's society telling us times have changed.
No matter what it is, women do like to be treated like princesses sometimes - not in cheesy ways but in common decent ways like:
- Opening doors for your lady
- Pulling her chair out for her at the table
- Paying the bill
- Picking her up from her house and driving her home
- Walking her to her door
- Complimenting her
A couple of weeks ago I went out on a blind date with a friend of a friend. It was a fabulous date but what caught me off guard was how much of a gentlemen he was. He picked me up, opened doors for me all night, walked me to my door at the end of the night and kissed me on the cheek good bye. I am defiently not use to this and questioned him why he did - to impress? His reply was simply he was a gentlemen and there was not enough of these kind actions going on anymore when it came to men and women. Fair enough!
Truth is - men just don't do it anymore and it's refreshing when they do. Just means chilvary may not be dead. Or perhaps women love the 'bad boy' and men have caught on to that and think that the nice boy is not th 'in' thing anymore!
Perhaps there needs to be a balance when it comes to blokes? Maybe it means being a bit bad to keep things interesting but remembering that sometimes being a gentlemen will win you points?
RIDDLE ME THIS:
When it comes to men, is chilvary dead?
AFL Central
However i think, well its been my experience personally that nice guys finish last and I guess a lot of guys dont know what to do
It seems to most that nice guys do finish last - but I think it's all about karma. In the end you will end up with some amazing person who is the love of your life.
All these chicks before that person is just an experience that teaches you something about relationships and what you want in a life partner!
So even though you may think you always finish last - it just means that current person is not meant to me and there is someone more worthwhile for you out there!
It seems to most that nice guys do finish last - but I think it's all about karma. In the end you will end up with some amazing person who is the love of your life.
All these chicks before that person is just an experience that teaches you something about relationships and what you want in a life partner!
So even though you may think you always finish last - it just means that current person is not meant to me and there is someone more worthwhile for you out there!
AFL Central
I find a lot,lot of my female friends are like aww your so sweet, or why cant more guys be like u, not too sound up myself,lol but yea then they go for complete jerks
confusin sometimes,lol.
cheers
If she can't see you for who you are then move on - plenty more chicks to date.
But remember though you do have to be attracted to someone in the first place to pursue anything so if the attractions not there - don't blame her. Just be thankful you can be friends!
Observer's Post
Death By Myopia
I grew up in a country where traditional attitude towards women is still strong. Understand, it's not subjugation of women or treating them as second-class citizens. It's just different to here in Oz where you don't have to give up your bus seat to a lady, for example. I read an article once where a guy held the door open for the lady walking behind him. As she passed, she told him "I bet that gives you a sense of power." Somehow, I can't seem to reconcile being a nice guy with respecting their independence. So, yeah, confusing. For me, anyway. *lol*
Cinematrix
As long as you're nice to a degree without looking fake or acting or trying I think and know it goes a long way.
It's also interesting to see where chivalry comes from which was a medieval response to the opposite of what was happening. Later it was illustrated through stories, art and song of women as perfect, unattainable creatures in contrast and contrary to how nobility and (particuarly) knights were behaving.
Cinematrix
To the question of men not being treated in the same was as men has to do with placement of gender roles before modernity (20th Century) and the archetypes displayed throughout history, i.e. guys fought in wars, held office and did manual work while ladies did the rest and rather specifically were exclusively for the maintenance of populating the city/principate/state, e.g. making babies.
Maybe girls getting hung up on not being treating like princesses has to do with the cultural divide that women face. While wanting to be equal as men, also recognise additionally that they should be treated specially. A valid statement in itself while also another reason why they're a paradox. lol But yeah, why shouldn't they? Also probably has to do with the defining the area of equality. Equality in the economic and political world while socially be treated as more than just like everyone else. It's this platform that people, irespective of gender, want to stand out from - first being at the same level as others, then aspiring to greater heights of individuality and status on an admirable level to get the best rewards in terms of financial position, partner, residence and so forth.