Is it ever ok to steal another girl's guy?
Angelina did it to Jen with Brad, Claire Danes did it to Mary Louise Parker with Billy - they stole their man?
Usually girl meets boy, girl likes boy, hooks up with boy and it's as simple as that! But what happens when he is already taken? Do we break the rules of sisterhood and do the unthinkable or do we simply step aside?
I am the first to be against cheating. I think it's a low act and says a lot of about the self esteem of the cheater! However, I have been caught in a siutation when I did steal another woman's man BUT little did I know he was even in a relationship.
I met Joseph out at a bar one night where his footy club celebrated another win for the season. I knew of him as he was well known around town but didn't know if he was in a relationship or was seeing anyone.
We had a great night together - a few drinks, a dance and at the end of the evening he kissed me good night! That was that!
But a few days later when I was having lunch with a friend, a brunette came up to me and started screaming and swearing at me that I had taken her man!
Well I was quite shocked! I felt ashamed but in my defence I did not know that he had a girlfriend. He didn't talk about her and when I asked if he was seeing anyone he said NO!
But now, I was in her eyes a bimbo, a bitch, a slut - all those lovely things because I was made out to be the man eater!
Here's my thoughts though - it takes two to tango. She should have been really looking at her relationship in that her boyfriend goes out and flirts with other woman and tells them he doesn't have a girlfriend. Is he really in love with her if he does that???
Maybe it's time to cut her loses and move on from someone who clearly doesn't want to be with her?
And for me - well I'll always be the man stealer in her eyes but hey, at least I know I didn't intentionally steal her man!
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Another scenario to throw out there for you to consider, say a mate of mine was dating a girl and they broke up and she was interested in me, I wouldnt date her.
I think friends come first. Relationships will come and go but friends are forever.
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Techbreak
The worst is how the sharks come out when there's some tension in a relationship. If girl has a fight with her boyfriend, you can bet all the single guys at her school/job are going to start lending a sympathetic ear.
TonyK - you bring up one of my favorite dating sayings that that blokes or chicks come and go, friends are forever! I am glad you have great morals when it comes to dating your mate's exes!
Cibby - you're so right in regards to the shark! Perhaps this is a challenge for some men or women - to see how far they can go before they win the prize?
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Flashes of memories
I recently found myself in a situation similar to yours - kissed a guy who I didnt realise was in a relationship and I was the one at the other end of the bat!
What amazes me even more is that these girls go back to these men and some of them even BEG the men to forgive them for being upset in the first place!
Come on ladies get a life I say, no man is worth you being a carpet for!
Ash
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Flashes of memories
I find it really sad that someone with a good spirit would subject themselves to treatment that is so unworthy of them. Wouldn`t it be great if we could make these people see things from our own eyes?
Hope your friends wake up soon before they waste too much time being unappreciated.
Ash
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Flashes of memories
and by the way.... do yal think he is going to leave her/??? I mean if he is cheating with me, then obviously she is not doing somethibg right at home.
I saw his interest in me. I made a bad decision of going out with him while he was with her.... it lasted 48 hours until he went to tell her they weren't together anymore.
We dated for 3 years after that. He is my first love.
So yes there is a possibility... but every case is different.
Think about the time that u have been with him.... at the same time that you say that there's obviously something that she's doing wrong, that's why he comes to you... But has he left her?
So before you give him your heart ask him if he is going to devote his heart ONLY to u as well.
Trust me... it doesn't feel good to be labelled as a boyfriend-stealer and a slut. You'll see that later on.... when u are in love...
even flirting will hurt you if he flirts with someone else.
Maybe it's time to have a talk with him.
And cheating is cheating... there's no way around it. I don't feel proud of it, but at the same time I wasn't fooling around, I actually saw how good we were together and we both wanted something serious.
Unluckily, I had a similar story recently too. As a rebound to this first love, I started flirting with an old-hook-up of mine. And he is currently living with his girlfriend. She found the msgs online and she is out to get me. Plus, he feels super guilty and told me not to msg him for a while.
I gained nothing out of it: only guilt and sadness.
I can't blame her or him...
And now I have to learn again. Even the best of us can make mistakes, for one reason or another. We just have to learn from them... even if you make the mistake 2 or 3 times. It's hard to get it right.