Too scared to be alone?
I have been single for a majority of my adulthood and I have embraced being single in the fact I don’t have any ties, I can go out when I want with who I want and run amok. Yes, it would be nice to have a relationship and be in love but I’m not going to lose sleep knowing that I don’t have a partner.
I’d like to think that we have come along in time and accepted that it is ok for a 20 something, 30 something or even 40 something to be single and able to play the field. Of course, there are other commitments in our lives that keep us busy – work, friends, family, exercise, SHOPPING!!!
However, there a number of women and men that couldn’t possibly live the single life and have one relationship after another – and unfortunately, these relationships continue to fail. Why then with such exposure to shows like Sex and the City which teach us that it is okay to be single, that today’s women and men are too scared to be alone?
A work colleague of mine who is only 23 has just broken up with her boyfriend of 2 years. She admitted that she has actually been unhappy in this relationship for sometime but she feared of being alone that she continued to stay in the relationship. Finally, she decided that she wasn’t happy and she broke up with her boyfriend.
This was a great opportunity for her to have a ‘gap’ year or a time of singlehood – a good chance to finder herself, spend time with her friends, meet a number of new men and most importantly have fun without the stress of a relationship.
Much to my surprise, this colleague pashed a bloke at the pub the night after the break up and immediately decided that he was the one and is now in a relationship with him.
This is starting to become a common trend in some women and men – that they can’t possibly be alone and need to be in a relationship or they’re not happy. To put it bluntly, this is a cop out and it usually comes down to self esteem in the fact that the woman or man is so unhappy with who s/he is as a person that s/he needs a partner to make them happy. But remember the good old saying ‘you have to be happy with yourself, before you’re happy with someone else.’ Well, I hate to say it, but it’s true because if you’re not happy, you’ll continue to have these failing relationships.
If you do find that you’re single, enjoy it because it’s not going to last forever. Eventually you will fall in love, and then you’ll have to start putting up with all their bad habits, their family, answering to your partner about your whereabouts and enjoying the rollercoaster ride of a partnership.
After a relationship is broken, relax, take a deep breath and tell yourself that you’ll be just fine on your own. You have your family, your friends and a million adventures of getting out and about again meeting lots of fabulous and interesting men or women.
To singlehood – cheers!
I’d like to think that we have come along in time and accepted that it is ok for a 20 something, 30 something or even 40 something to be single and able to play the field. Of course, there are other commitments in our lives that keep us busy – work, friends, family, exercise, SHOPPING!!!
However, there a number of women and men that couldn’t possibly live the single life and have one relationship after another – and unfortunately, these relationships continue to fail. Why then with such exposure to shows like Sex and the City which teach us that it is okay to be single, that today’s women and men are too scared to be alone?
A work colleague of mine who is only 23 has just broken up with her boyfriend of 2 years. She admitted that she has actually been unhappy in this relationship for sometime but she feared of being alone that she continued to stay in the relationship. Finally, she decided that she wasn’t happy and she broke up with her boyfriend.
This was a great opportunity for her to have a ‘gap’ year or a time of singlehood – a good chance to finder herself, spend time with her friends, meet a number of new men and most importantly have fun without the stress of a relationship.
Much to my surprise, this colleague pashed a bloke at the pub the night after the break up and immediately decided that he was the one and is now in a relationship with him.
This is starting to become a common trend in some women and men – that they can’t possibly be alone and need to be in a relationship or they’re not happy. To put it bluntly, this is a cop out and it usually comes down to self esteem in the fact that the woman or man is so unhappy with who s/he is as a person that s/he needs a partner to make them happy. But remember the good old saying ‘you have to be happy with yourself, before you’re happy with someone else.’ Well, I hate to say it, but it’s true because if you’re not happy, you’ll continue to have these failing relationships.
If you do find that you’re single, enjoy it because it’s not going to last forever. Eventually you will fall in love, and then you’ll have to start putting up with all their bad habits, their family, answering to your partner about your whereabouts and enjoying the rollercoaster ride of a partnership.
After a relationship is broken, relax, take a deep breath and tell yourself that you’ll be just fine on your own. You have your family, your friends and a million adventures of getting out and about again meeting lots of fabulous and interesting men or women.
To singlehood – cheers!
























